Monday, February 20, 2012

Character Disturbance The Phenomenon of Our Age

Are there people who seem to bring confusion and pain into your life and you do not understand why or how they got that foothold? Perhaps you feel someone else is in control of your life and you would like to know how to regain your control. While this is not a ‘How-To’ book, it is a book to help you understand Disturbed Characters that may be around you. Finally, it has information to have healthy relationships in your life.

Internationally known for his bestseller, In Sheep’s Clothing: Understanding and Dealing with Manipulative People, author George K. Simon Jr., Ph. D. is back with Character Disturbance The Phenomenon of Our Age.

Simon states Disturbed Characters have specific reasons for behaving the way they do. In sharing his experience and research, through this book, Simon wants to alert the unsuspecting from any disadvantage the Disturbed Characters will have.

From the founding of our country, integrity and character has been recognized as an integral part of our society. Some positive aspects of an individual’s character are seen as self-control, ethics, loyalty, fortitude, and virtue.

A Disturbed Character “individual are notoriously nonchalant about things that upset most other people.”

Lacking an under-developed conscience, Disturbed Characters have the ability to injure without shame or guilt. With that, many Disturbed Characters lack genuine remorse for their acts that are hurtful to others. While they may offer an ‘I’m sorry’, it is not out of sincere contrition; nor is it an admission of guilt.

It is fruitless to confront a Disturbed Character, hoping they would feel shame or guilt, as it will only add to the victim’s frustrations. A Disturbed Character knows what they are doing; the result is what their actions were intending.

Control and manipulation are the keys used by Disturbed Characters. Usually they are subtle, but if cornered, a Disturbed Character must maintain the standard of control and their advantage is then at risk. A Disturbed Character looks at others with disdain – knowing they have the upper hand because they perceive themselves to be smarter and superior, thus they have the right to exploit others. You might have heard one vocal this, “I am smarter than everyone else.” It is because they believe it.

Simon describes four types of Aggression – overt, covert, active, and passive. He also states there are three things to remember in dealing with Disturbed Characters and aggressive personalities – position, position, position. Meaning a Disturbed Character must always maintain the upper hand, be in the dominate position, and resist submission to a higher power. All are part of the primary agenda for Disturbed Character personalities.

One should not try to change a Disturbed Character. They are truly happy with who they are. In fact, they are more satisfied with their lives than most non- Disturbed Characters will ever be. How could that be? Disturbed Characters do not experience ego problems. Self-confidence is not an issue with them. They can turn the charm on or off to accomplish their task, using whatever behaviors are necessary.

Simon suggests eleven tools to empower the average person to survive an encounter with a Disturbed Character. A few of them are:

*Become a Better Judge of Character;
*Knowing Yourself – understanding your own needs, insecurities, and belief systems;
*Invest Energy Only Where You Have Power – choose battles carefully, avoid losing battles, take charge of your own behavior;
*Never Accept an Excuse – if a behavior is wrong, there is no reason to accept it;
*Judge Actions, Not Intentions – actions speak louder than words;
*Stay Focused on the Here and Now – no exceptions;

Remember who you are dealing with and who has control of your life.

BIBLIO: June 2011, Parkhurst Brothers Publishers, Inc., Adult NF, $29.95
REVIEWER: Debby Willett
ISBN: 978-1-935166-32-0

Reviewed for KSB Promotions Visibility Specialists,

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